Kink of the Week: Hands

I didn't realize that I had a hand fetish until I was in my late-twenties. I knew that I was somewhat obsessed with and felt excited by hands. I just didn't really know what it meant. It never crossed my mind until one day, Olivia asked, "Do you have a hand fetish?" Then, it all clicked.

All throughout my life, I have spent a lot of time staring at the hands and fingers of random people. My first memory of this is from when I was a young child, about 8 years old. My mom liked to play solitaire at the kitchen table. I would sit at that table and watch her closely, just getting lost in the movement of her hands as she shuffled the cards and played the game. I could sit there for so long and just be completely content.

As I got older, I started having sexual feelings. In junior high, I would walk around school noticing everyone's hands. Did they look soft? Were they nicely manicured? Were their fingers long and skinny? Were they short and fat? I developed crushes on people who had nice looking hands. I would fantasize about them touching me. Eventually, I got up the courage to ask if I could touch people's hands. I would say something like, "Wow! Your hands look so soft! Can I feel them?" Or, "Oh, your nail polish looks amazing! Can I see it closer?" As soon as I touched them, I was instantly turned on. While masturbating, I would imagine someone running their hands over my body and I would cum so fast. When I started having sex in high school, I quickly realized that the only way I could orgasm is if my partner was touching me with their hand. I had to focus on that hand or it just wouldn't happen. I'm not sure why I didn't question that but it just seemed normal to me.

When I'm in public, I stare at the hands of strangers. I fantasize about those hands. I imagine what they would feel like when touching my body. I think about what they would taste like. I flush at the thought of cumming all over their fingers. This is made worse by people who talk with their hands. I have a very hard time concentrating on a conversation when the person I'm talking to is moving their hands all over the place in front of my face. This has caused some issues in the past where people thought I wasn't listening to them. I just get so caught up in these dirty thoughts and I don't know how to stop myself.

Most of my crushes over the years have been solely caused by the fact that I was into their hands. Throughout the relationship, I stay obsessed with their hands. It never gets old. When I cuddle with my partners, I pet their hands. I run my fingers over the back of their hand and over their palm. I trace their fingers with my fingertips. It calms me and turns me on at the same time. I really like holding hands in public as well.

You may be wondering what kind of hands I prefer. I will do my best to describe what I consider the perfect hands. First, I like them to be feminine looking. They must be soft, not rough. The nails should be neatly filed short (not bitten). I find myself attracted to square shaped nails more than anything else. I prefer the fingers to be somewhat thin and the longer, the better. I also really like when I can see a few tendons or puffy veins sticking up on the back of their hand.

The person who, in my opinion, has the best hands in the whole world is Tom Odell. I have fantasized about that man more than anyone else. He just really does it for me. In September of 2013, I met him outside of a club where he was performing. I shook that perfect hand...with my sweaty palms. Ugh. I've wanted a re-do ever since. I've never gotten my chance.


Tom Odell's amazing piano hands. Photo Credit

So, no matter if it's Tom's hands, Husband's hands, or someone else's hands that I'm into, I just want to be touched by hands all the time. That is my heaven. My hand fetish is quite distracting at times and it can be quite irritating, but I love it. I wouldn't change a thing.

My First Experience with Eating Pussy

The first girl I had sex with was my ex-best-friend, Olivia. I enjoyed sex with her but it always felt like it was lacking something. I loved her very much as a friend and it was fun to mess around. I just didn't have strong feelings for her otherwise. So, I never felt comfortable enough to go down on her. I got so caught up in the idea that my first time should be with someone special, that I didn't allow myself to go there with her.

The second girl I had sex with was Kirsten. She was beautiful and I wanted her so badly right from the beginning. I couldn't wait to have sex with her but she wanted to take things very slowly because she had a lot of anxiety (I found out later that she's actually asexual so that explained a lot). The first couple times we had sex, she didn't want me to go down on her. So, even though I wanted to, I respected her wishes. When she was finally feeling more comfortable with everything, I started feeling too nervous about doing it. Would I even know what I was doing? I talked to Husband about the anxiety I was feeling and he made me feel better. I finally felt ready to do it. That was when we ended up breaking up. Fuck.

I dated another girl, Erica, for a short time. She talked a lot about wanting to have sex with me but every time I tried, there was some excuse to prevent it from actually happening. After months of trying to no avail, I gave up. I definitely would have gone down on her if I were given the chance though.

The third girl I had sex with was Sasha. I fell VERY hard for her. It actually took a while for me to act on it because I was so terrified of getting hurt. I knew my feelings for her were very strong and I didn't want to put myself out there to get hurt. Her wife kept pushing us together and I finally let my guard down. We started dating but we didn't rush the sex part. There was lots of making out and heavy petting but it took a couple months to finally get to the sex. The first time we had sex was at a kink play party in front of four other people. We were lying on a bed, half naked, and making out. Things were getting really hot and she whispered, "Can I taste you?" I said yes, so she did. I wanted to do the same for her but there was no way I was going to be able to convince myself to eat pussy for the first time in front of four other people who were watching us.

A couple weeks later, Sasha came over to my place. We were sitting on the couch talking and I couldn't keep my eyes off of her body. I wanted her so badly. We started making out and playing with each other's boobs. We were both very turned on. Hands were wandering and kisses were turning into neck nibbles. She asked if I'd like to go to the bedroom. I was excited and nervous all at the same time. I knew I was ready to finally do it but I was still afraid that I wouldn't know what I was doing. I silently promised myself that I would not back out this time.

We laid down on the bed together and started making out again. My hands kept making their way up her shirt. She had the most amazing tits and I wanted my hands all over them. As our hands continued to wander, our clothes started to come off. Once our bras were removed, I rubbed my breasts against hers. Our nipples touched and I moaned out in pleasure. That has to be one of my favorite things to do with a woman. Mashing our tits together. Mmmm. I can't get enough of that. Sasha started to suck on my nipples while rubbing my clit gently. I was so turned on that it felt like I could cum any second. She stopped and kissed me one more time before moving her mouth down to my thighs. She kissed, licked, and nibbled her way down the inside of my thigh until she reached my pussy. She licked the outside, teasing me. I arched my back, aching for more. She opened my pussy lips and started to lick my clit. I felt her fingers slide into my very wet cunt. As she finger fucked me and licked my clit, I ran my fingers through her hair. It wasn't long before I was cumming hard, grabbing a handful of hair and pulling on it as I did.

Sasha laid down next to me again and I kissed her hard. I could taste my pussy on her lips and it excited me. I nibbled her neck, down to her collar bone, then licked and kissed my way to her nipples. While massaging her breast, I sucked on her nipple until she moaned. I continued down to her belly. I caressed her hips while I kissed around her belly button. I moved down to her thighs, licking, kissing, nibbling. I caressed her lower legs, down to her feet. As she moaned louder, I got even more turned on. I caressed her vulva gently with my fingers, softly tracing the line where her legs meet her crotch. I put my face so close that she could feel my hot breath, teasing her. I was very excited to taste her. So, I swallowed my nervousness, took a deep breath, and went for it. I parted her lips and gave a long, slow, gentle lick from the opening of her pussy to the top of her clit. I buried my face in her cunt, inhaling her sweet smell. I licked her clit slowly, occasionally stopping to stick my tongue inside her. She started to arch her back, so I licked faster and slid my fingers inside her. I massaged her g-spot as I ate her pussy. She started to cum all over my face, squirting her juices into my mouth, and I moaned as I drank them. She didn't seem to want me to stop, so I continued to lick her clit. I made her cum once more, then I collapsed next to her.

As we were cuddling, I told her that was my first time and she said I did an amazing job. I felt such pride in that moment. I couldn't wait to do it again. I ate her pussy every time I had the chance after that. She ended up breaking my heart but I'm glad I finally got my first pussy eating experience out of the way. Now, hopefully I won't get so caught up when doing it with other women. If I ever get the chance to be with other women, that is. I really miss eating pussy. So very much. There has to be someone out there that needs a tongue on their clit...

Sucking and Fucking

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Can masturbation be cheating?

Seriously, the orgasms that my shower head gives me are so powerful that it almost makes me feel like I'm cheating on my husband. Nothing else has ever made me cum like that. I definitely forgot how amazing it feels. I'm glad I now have the chance to experience it again. I have been doing my best to not do it too often. I don't want to make Husband jealous. Though, I guess I could invite him in there with me. I love trying new things!

In other news, the closer we get to actually having a threesome with the sexy Jacob, the more excited I become. I am hoping things work out how we want them to. I have so many fantasies in my head about it. I can't wait until we finally get to experience it. Mmmm. It turns me on just thinking about it. Fun times to come!

I have also been thinking about Olivia a lot lately. I fear she has completely lost interest in me. I can't remember the last time we were intimate and it doesn't seem to be a high priority for her to make time for it. For that reason, I've backed off. I'm giving her space. If she decides that she wants me again, I welcome her to come to me. Otherwise, I'll just continue being her friend. I really need a girlfriend...badly. I am holding out hope that I will find one this year. We will see in time...

Night in a hotel...with no sleeping involved

Husband and I went to a Drag Show with friends on Saturday night. As usual, all the gay men in the bar were drooling over him. What can I say? He's hot stuff! We were sitting right next to the stage, so the drag queens were all over him. One of them came up and showed Husband a picture of him out of drag...obviously hoping he would be interested. He was not. There was one person that he was attracted to though. This drag queen was the hottest one there. Even I wanted a piece of that! Haha. He was feeling up Husband's chest like crazy and even gave him a lap dance of sorts, grinding his ass on Husband's lap and rubbing up against him. Husband blushed and enjoyed all of it. I enjoyed it as well! Seeing him with another man turns me on like nothing else in this world. It is hot as hell. We had a really great time and as we were leaving, the drag queen put his hand down Husband's shirt. Turns out, he was putting a napkin with his number on it in there. Maybe something will come of that? We shall see...

I was so incredibly turned on at that point, but we were riding with friends, so I couldn't do anything to relieve the sexual tension. That car ride was torture, let me tell ya. I was wishing we had wandered off to the bathroom for a few minutes. I kept staring at Husband and fantasizing, thinking so many dirty thoughts in my head and wishing he could read my mind. I just wanted to tear off his clothes, climb on top of him, and go crazy. Instead, I settled for sending him a couple naughty text messages.

We were invited to stay in a hotel with a couple friends that night. When we got dropped off at the hotel, we went up to the room as quickly as possible. We had a small amount of time before our friends showed up at the hotel. On one hand, I felt horrible for using the room they were paying for before they even had a chance to be in it...but on the other hand, I may have exploded if I didn't release all that tension! I figured they would understand. So, we stripped our clothes quickly and got to it!

Husband came up behind me and started kissing my neck. That's my second most sensitive erogenous zone. Mmmm. I moaned softly, enjoying the feeling of his warm breath on my skin. Suddenly, he shoved me down on the bed. I stood there, bent over the bed, begging for him to enter me from behind. He started to tease me with his cock, but I just couldn't take anymore teasing. I thrust my ass back so that his cock entered my pussy. I moaned loudly. It felt AMAZING. My whole body broke out in goosebumps and I felt all tingly. When Husband grew tired of that position, he turned me over and ordered me to lay on the edge of the bed with my ass hanging off. He grabbed my legs, rested them on his shoulders, and started to fuck me again. Every time he entered me, he hit my G-spot with such accuracy that I could barely breathe. I was loving that position, until Husband wanted me from behind again. He got up on the bed with me, and I noticed there was a mirror on the wall at bed height. I thought, "Oh wow. Now, this is going to be fun." I had never watched someone fuck me before and it was great! I must have one of those in my room! I think being able to watch him ram me from behind made it feel a lot better...and I didn't even think that was possible! The way his body moved...I can't even describe it with words. I almost wish I had a video! Though, I'd probably be too self conscious to post it anyway. After enjoying that for a while, we switched positions again. I laid on my back, legs up in the air, Husband pushing my legs toward my chest, and I masturbated while he fucked me. That amazing orgasm had been waiting hours to come. I was so relieved that it finally did. We got up and Husband had me bend over the bed again. He fucked me some more, and then right as he was about to cum, he pulled out and came all over my ass. That was incredibly hot. We washed up and got some clothes on just in time for our friends to show up. Not sure how guilty we both looked though. Haha.

Olivia and Shawn are two good friends of ours. They are married, but have an open marriage to a certain extent. I'm not exactly clear on all the details of that, but I know the ones that matter to me. ;)  Olivia and I have had a few sexual experiences together, however, Shawn and I just enjoy some innocent heavy flirting. Husband was worn out from all the hard work he had just done, so he decided to go to sleep on the pull-out couch bed. Shawn, Olivia and I laid on the bed together and talked for a while. Eventually things got sexual. With us, it never takes long before that happens. They are both just as sexual as I am! Shawn pulled up Olivia's shirt and we both ran our fingers lightly over her back. Just like me, her back is the most sensitive erogenous zone on her body. Shawn and I played tic-tac-toe on her back with our fingers. She would let out little moans as we were marking our spaces. It was so much fun, and not that it matters, but I won. ;) After teasing her for a while, Shawn finally lifted Olivia's skirt and revealed her sexy panties to me. Honestly, they were pretty hot. Mmmm...mental image...nice. Wish I could share with you. I will try to describe them, but the description will not do them justice. It was a teal string bikini with a big butterfly on the front and a tiny butterfly sewed on the back at the top. I loved them. She was laying on her tummy, with her ass facing the mirror that I mentioned earlier. As I watched in the mirror, Shawn's hand wandered further under those panties. He then rubbed her clit until a sweet moan came from her lips. That sound made my lady-bits fill with blood and wake up again. Shawn removed Olivia's panties and over the next hour or so (okay, I was having so much fun that I really have no true concept of time here), he gave her another 3 or 4 orgasms by fingering her. Honestly, I wished it was me doing that, but I was feeling too shy to jump in there and take over. Shawn wanted me to, I know, but I am just so shy with women that it's actually sad. I did manage to continue running my hands over her body as much as I could. During all of this, Olivia also touched me a little bit. She rubbed on my tits, played with my nipple, and just softly caressed my body.

Eventually, all the noise woke Husband. We invited him to come join us on the bed. He took us up on that invite. I scooted closer to Olivia, and he laid behind me on the bed. I removed my pants and bra to allow for easier access. ;)  Olivia and Husband ran their hands lightly all over my body. Feeling both of their hands on me at the same time was almost a sensory overload. When I'm not looking, I can't even tell whose hand is whose because Husband has such amazingly soft hands. Shawn was watching closely, which turned me on but at the same time made me nervous. I have never been naked in front of him before and I was feeling very self conscious. Husband put his hand inside my panties and started fingering me. While this was going on, Olivia and I continued to run our hands over each others bodies. Shawn was still caressing Olivia's back, and occasionally, our hands would cross over each other and he would caress my hand/arm as well. I actually enjoyed that a lot. It felt good that three people wanted to be touching me at the same time. My senses were definitely on overload. Shawn made Olivia cum one last time, and even though I love the sound of her moaning, I was having a hard time cumming myself. Usually it doesn't take very long for me to reach orgasm, but nervousness can obviously cause performance problems. The longer it took me, the more I stressed about it I got, and it turned into a vicious cycle. Husband was a trooper and continued on until I was finally able to force myself to the point of orgasm. Shawn said, "Someone give that man a gold star!" He definitely deserved one, that's for sure. That was some really hard work!

By the time we were finished, it was already 8am. Olivia and Shawn sadly had to go home. I was really looking forward to watching them fuck, but that didn't end up happening. Oh well, maybe sometime in the future that will happen. After they left, Husband fucked me doggy style in front of that mirror again. HOT! HOT! HOT! Seriously, I need one of those mirrors in my bedroom! After we were done, we got dressed, went down to eat some free breakfast foods and then went home. No rest for the wicked, you know. It was totally worth it.

Olivia and Shawn are really fun people. I love hanging out with them. I don't know a whole lot of people who are as sexual as I am. It's like a breath of fresh air. They make me feel normal, while most people are just annoyed by how much I talk about sex. I am who I am...and they love who I am. That makes me happy. I'm sure there will be many more stories about them in the future.