The topic for Kink of the Week is fisting. If you're new to this, fisting involves inserting one's whole hand/fist into the vagina or anus for sexual pleasure. For the purpose of this blog post, I will only be discussing vaginal fisting, as I have never experienced anal fisting.
Fisting isn't a topic that I've always thought about in a positive light. In fact, it was a hard limit for me until five years ago. Having my vagina stretched seemed like a painful activity that I would never enjoy. Husband was very into the thought of doing it. He had brought it up multiple times and I always answered in the same way. It will absolutely never happen. End of story.
One night, things got very heated. We were both very aroused. Husband was rubbing my clit with his fingers while I was lying face-down on the bed. I was very wet and his fingers were gliding across my vulva with no resistance. I felt him stick two of his fingers inside me and thrust them in and out of my pussy. He would take his fingers out, suck the juices off of them, and then put them back in. Soon, he added another finger and continued to finger fuck me. It felt so good. I started to move my hips with his thrusts. I was so turned on, the juices were just leaking out of me. My pussy kept feeling fuller and fuller as time went on. It no longer felt like fingers were inside me but something much bigger. I started to feel a little scared about being so full but it felt so good that I didn't want to tell him to stop. I pushed the thought away and just went with it. As the feeling of fullness increased, I started to feel pain. It hurt but it felt good at the same time. I felt confused because I wasn't sure what was happening. I just knew I was enjoying it. I felt him plunge deeper and deeper, making me moan out in pleasure. I could hear Husband breathing hard and ragged. This sure was exciting him. A LOT! That excited me more. Finally, he asked, "Do you like feeling my fist inside you?" What?? The feeling was so intense that I couldn't even allow myself to be worried any longer. I let myself go and began to cum all over his hand. I squirted so much that night that I think I was dehydrated the next day.
That was my first experience with fisting and I ended up enjoying it even though I didn't think I would. I think the fact that Husband has smaller hands than most men helps a lot. They are only a little bigger than my own. I'm not sure that I would be excited to try fisting with a person with large hands. That's actually quite scary to me. I would like to try getting fisted by a woman. I'd also like to try fisting a woman. I'd love to feel what it feels like from the other end.
So, what exactly do I enjoy about fisting?
The feeling of being full is very intoxicating. There is nothing like it. It makes me feel very slutty. I like to imagine that multiple cocks are being shoved inside me and I'm being used by many men. Husband plays on this by calling me a slut or a whore and I get off so hard from it. It also makes me feel brave. I feel scared every time we try it. My anxiety is so high when we start. Will I be able to take it? Is it going to hurt? Will I have to tell him to stop? Though, after it's over, I feel like I have accomplished something. Especially if Husband calls me a good girl after (omg, yes!). All of that is great but honestly, the biggest thing that excites me about fisting is that it's a hand inside me. I have a hand fetish, which means I need hands on me and in me to get off. I love being fingered. It's one of my favorite things. Fingers thrusting deep and hard into my pussy. Mmmm. I can't get enough of that. Of course, the idea of having a whole hand in there is hot as well.
So, what are some things that I don't enjoy as much about fisting?
Fisting is something that I really have to be in the mood for. It's not something I can just convince myself to do if I'm not feeling up for it and sometimes it takes me a few days to get the nerve to go along with it. I would say that most of the time that Husband tries to initiate fisting, I really just prefer to have four of his fingers inside me. It makes me feel full enough that it's enjoyable, but not as painful as sticking the thumb and whole fist in there as well. I do like that he occasionally pushes my limits and goes for the whole thing though. I think I mostly just dislike the painfulness of walking around and sitting with a sore vagina the next day. Sometimes, I just don't want to deal with the mess either. Fisting can be very messy. It makes me squirt a lot, so we definitely have to put a mattress pad down before doing it.
Now that I know that I enjoy fisting, it still isn't something that we do often. I would say that we do it maybe three or four times a year. It's also not something that I talk about much. I am an open book in real life. I talk about my sexual experiences often but I have only talked about fisting twice with people who aren't my sexual partner. Why is this? Well, there is a stigma behind it. If you enjoy fisting, your vagina must be loose. If you allow yourself to get fisted, it will loosen your vagina. These are things that I've heard people say and neither one of them is true. The vagina stretches a lot but it doesn't stay that way. It returns to normal after stretching. As long as you are very careful (trim those nails or use gloves), use lots of lube (more than you think you need), go slowly (prepare for this to take a while), and communicate with your partner (make sure to stop if they are in too much pain), there shouldn't be any long term harm done to the vagina. Relax and enjoy the journey. It's definitely not for everyone but if you enjoy it, don't be embarrassed. There's nothing wrong with you or your vagina.
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